Ignoring the blog.
I’ve been busy. Or BUSIER, rather … my biology class will be ending next month. My nursing assistant course just started and is taking up most of my time. In the meantime, I’ve been checking, double-checking, and triple-checking the mailbox to see if my admissions letter has arrived yet. Each day I’m met with bills, ads, coupons, spam, crap. No admissions letter. I tear the ads and coupons apart thinking maybe the letter slid in between the pages somehow. They said it could be expected in late March – early April but I can’t help to obsess over it daily, thinking it might be there already. (I’ve been obsessing way before the letter was even expected though, so of course as time draws nearer, my OCD behavior just gets worse and worse).
I almost backed out of my nursing assistant course before it started. As I flipped through the textbook, certain words and phrases jumped off the page that scared the hell out of me.
What to do if you walk in on a patient, having … um … private time with themselves.
And many other things that I won’t mention here because … just because. I know the nursing assistants do the dirty work. I ADMIRE the nursing assistants for doing the dirty work. I know if I were unable to care for myself, I would appreciate someone being there to help me do it or do it for me.
But do I really want to do it?
No, not really.
I’m only doing it because it’s now required by my state in order to be accepted into the x-ray tech program. Thanks a lot, state! It’s a new thing. Otherwise, no, no thank you, uh-uh, nope. I only hope the week-long clinical session won’t be that bad. I would like to get through it without being urinated on, vomited on, defecated on, and so on and so forth. I’m not all that bothered by blood but I also do not want to be bled on. And if any of those things do happen, I hope I will have the ability to not in turn get sick all over the patient. I’ve been practicing in my head how things will go. I think if I just hold my breath and go to my happy place then all will be okay.
As for clinical, it’s just six days. I can do six days!
I feel like my life is in limbo just waiting on that damn letter, which may or may not contain good news. And I could use some good news, because this year hasn’t been the greatest with my husband being ill (and he’s still not doing well, but that’s another story).
I was planning not to update here again until I had some bigger, better news. Alas, this is all there is for now.
Hasta luego. Hope you are well.